Do you ever feel like you have to stand still to find love? I sure did. It's part of the reason I put off traveling for so long. It felt very scary to leave and be nomadic when I wasn't already in a relationship. It is, of course, the irony of the Universe that the moment I went traveling, I found my partner and entered into a beautiful 7 month relationship. The thing I was fearful would prevent me from finding love is exactly how I found it!
Guy and I decided to end our romantic relationship and continue on in each others lives as dear friends but, it was still a successful partnership...perhaps the most successful I've had thus far. I say this only because it was 7 months of healing and filling up my love cup. I came out of it refreshed, grateful and totally full. What more can you ask for from love? Nothing, as far as I'm concerned.
Now, I'm planning my next adventure and decided I'll be moving to Paris for one year to learn French and enjoy France. It feels wildly impossible at this moment but, so has everything else I've done. When I feel that now, I know I'm moving in the right direction. As I've been getting clear on wanting to go to Paris and setting my intention to leave on a particular date, the old fear of not being able to find love if I keep bouncing around popped up again. This time it got a little deeper and told me I would never have kids if I keep running around like I am. Have you ever felt this way? Like you have to give up one dream to have another?
The beautiful thing about fear for me now, is that I understand what it actually is trying to do. The voice whispering that to me is my inner critic (I talk about it in depth here)/ego and it is whispering these limiting beliefs to keep me safe. Humans are running on brain software from when we cavemen and the egoic voice was meant to protect us from harm because we were in survival mode hunting, gathering and fending off attacks from saber tooth tigers. In this day and age, we are no longer fighting for our lives and the egoic voice meant to keep us safe has morphed into the inner critic which is now holding us back. For me when I plan a new travel adventure and the fear of traveling preventing love comes up, my ego/inner critic is trying to keep me safe at home. However, I know that I need to over ride that programming and continue to plan my journey to Paris. When I'm ready to call in my next relationship, I will revisit all my tools to bring in my partner and trust the Universe will guide together at the most divine time. I will never have to stop living to find what is meant for me.
The idea that we can't live big, full lives full of adventure and travel and still find love is false. I think the best way to find love is to live the life we always dreamed of living. When we create the life we want versus the life we think we should have, we open ourselves to being our authentic selves. Being our authentic selves attracts in other humans who are doing the same and finding love beyond what we thought possible, happens. If you have felt like you have to play small to find love or shelf a dream to meet a partner, than that is very thing blocking you from finding your next relationship. Start doing the work to raise your worth enough so you have no choice but to dream bigger and follow through on those dreams. When you are fulfilling yourself and making your dreams a reality instead of waiting around for life to begin, you will become a magnet for a partner doing the very same. Love will find you, no matter where you may be in the world.
If you're feeling stuck in love and looking for guidance, I would love to connect with you over a session.